Identity, Strength and the Thorn in my Flesh

Grace Dellis
Aug 6, 2016
4 min read

The thing about suffering is that we want it to end as quickly as possible. Given the choice, most of us would probably say we’d prefer a life totally free of suffering and trials. We want to be strong and victorious in our lives, carving out success stories that appear humble, but often times are rooted in deep desires to be the best at something, to rule out hardship, and to create a life that emulates “goals.”

Sister, I think there’s a better story out there for us, but I don’t think it’s one that will have our name in the byline.

In 2 Corinthians 12, Paul tells a particularly moving story about “a thorn that was given [to him] in the flesh…” Paul writes that this thorn was a “messenger of Satan,” sent to harass him, that he would not become conceited. While it’s unclear whether Paul is talking about a physical demon, a spiritual battle, or some other kind of physical ailment, he is clear that the thorn in his flesh was something God allowed and used for good. Verses 8 and 9 say, “Three times I pleaded with the Lord about this, that it should leave me. But he said to me,

‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is perfected in weakness.’ Therefore, I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me.”

I love this passage. I love it because I understand, as so many of us do, that earnest desire for God to show His care for us by removing the thorns from our lives. I love the picture of Paul’s willingness to immediately choose to boast in his weaknesses so God’s grace and Christ’s power would be what people notice. He doesn’t waver in his decision, but instead decides directly and wholeheartedly that if God’s grace is sufficient for him, than his boast and contentment will be found in that grace alone. It’s easy to believe the lie that if God is a loving, perfect Father, He will not allow His children to suffer any trial or difficulty, but Scripture tells us a different story. Scripture tells us the story of a God who doesn’t want us to live within our own strengths or measures.

My thorn has come by way of sickness. Not even six months after my husband and I were married, I entered into a season of constant sickness. Since then, I’ve been diagnosed with a long list of issues, from chronic disorders to chronic sources of pain, and it’s been an uphill battle ever since. My husband and I learned early on the value of the vow “in sickness and in health,” and I learned the value of suffering well. Our prayer life thrived on the promise of God being our Great Physician, but it wasn’t a miraculous healing that helped me understand God’s plan for our lives. It was my continued sickness.

I have questioned everything about God that could possibly be questioned, but until I surrendered to the Truth that God’s goodness is totally separate from my circumstances, I couldn’t begin to experience joy within my suffering. Understanding God’s goodness as a trait completely distinct from my health has been a saving grace to my faith.

I had to learn that conditions can’t be placed on how we understand God’s love and care for us, and believing in God includes trusting that our circumstances are part of His divine, perfect plan.

As a Christian, my identity is that of a beloved daughter of the Most High King; my identity is that of God’s own inheritance. Just like my identity is not found in my job or my marriage, it is not found in my health. When I am sick, I am no less a child of God than when I am well. If my identity is secure, so is my strength. Let that sink in for a moment, friends: If our identities are secure, so is our strength. When we have an identity that does not have to be earned, created, or achieved, we are able to access a strength that will never waver.

I don’t know what your thorn is, or how long you’ve battled with it. Wherever you are, though, and regardless of what thorn is buried deep in your flesh, know that God is deeper still. Scripture tells us that “neither height nor depth, not anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:39). Let it be a relentless reminder that as long as your identity is firmly established in Christ, your strength will come from the very things you count as weaknesses, as God Himself sustains you. Our portion of overflowing joy is found not in our own goodness, but in our willingness to allow God to be great. In a world that worships busyness, I think God would ask us to sit in the hard places a little bit longer - not out of complacency, but out of patience. When we look at the lives of men like Paul, we should be both convicted and encouraged that the Lord’s promise to us is not a life free of pain or suffering, but that His protection of His people is guaranteed, and that the power of the Spirit at work within us will always be sufficient provision.

The world owns a narrative of quick fixes, instant gratification, and identity achieved through accolades. But our better story is one of resilience, steadfastness and patience, and identity secured by sacrifice. Which story will you tell?

Grace Dellis is a small town Georgia girl living in Sydney, Australia with her husband. She is a Program and Social Media Co-ordinator for a crisis pregnancy centre, working to empower women to make life-affirming choices, and equipping them to write better stories of motherhood. She believes in the power of the feminine heart, the value of women supporting women, and the relevance of Christ to every circumstance. She writes to teach people about the heart of God, and believes that our collective calling is to use our gifts and talents to stir the world's heart for Jesus.